I'm dying for your virginity.

Whatever expectations you have from reading the title and the synopsis, the manga is absolutely not like that. I was very prejudiced when I started reading this manga and thought I would drop it fast, after all the MC was this fat ugly guy who turned back in time to take his wife's virginity. I honestly expected smut. However the opposite happened and I couldn't put it down. The manga is a rollercoaster of emotions and handles a lot of heavy themes in a good and compelling way. The art is also very good and detailed. It really brings out the uglyness and the beauty of thecharacters without being too exaggerated. What I really enjoyed was the character development of the MC over the course of the story. His motivation was shallow at the beginning but turned into this pursuit to give his wife a happy future while experiencing the different outcomes of his actions and learning more about her. This manga is underrated and I definitely recommend it.

"I will do anything to be Mika's first." Just like the title of the manga 'I'm dying for your virginity.' is at the start one of the main focal points of our protagonist Tooru to continue traveling into the past to be Mika's lover. Let's rewind a bit, shall we? The manga starts us with a not-so-charming, good-looking, nor decent protagonist named Tooru he's in his '30s and through some stroke of luck was able to get together with Mika. Mika is a very charming individual that way out of his league, even so, they're together. Although there is an obsession with him about not beingher first time eats at him at his core. I'm going to address this now so readers that don't want a read story for this reason alone, to let you know that it actually gets addressed later on. Anyhow, due to his unlucky circumstances, he gets hit by a train and finds himself in his high school days. Every interaction, small or large affects his outcome in the future, it goes from being Mika to being someone or not at all with anyone. This is the journey we entrusted upon and seeing the growth of Tooru as a person from having no friends, to being somewhat of a decent person. The art goes to the extremes where in one panel it's adorably cute, and in the very next Tooru is being his disgusting old self. It's such a diverse and unique style that it flips from one to another. This manga isn't for the faint of heart as there are extreme and even uncomfortable situations. Even so Tooru as faulty as he is a chad nonetheless and massive props to him.

After a whole night of reading, this is an amazing read. The story has ups and downs. You simply cannot predict what will happen next (except the ending kind of). When you thought the MC got it in his hand, it slips. And when things are out of reach, the MC somehow grasped it. The story of the MC is the one that he achieved himself. He had spent blood sweat and tear to get the happy ending that he deserved. Aside from the many story of betrayal, heartbreaking moments; I would highly recommend this if you can take them on. Honestly I think everyone canread this since I am personally really bad at reading these kind of things. My review isn't doing this manga justice, you have to try it to get the full experience.

tl;dr: A manga centered around a pretty strange but really great character and relationship arc. This manga has a premise and opening that are somewhat misleading. It begins with the protagonist, Tooru, who looks quite a bit like the typical ugly bastard you’d see in hentai, mulling over how he wasn’t the one that took his wife, Mika’s, virginity and wishing that he was. And then his consciousness seems to get thrown back into his high school self so that he can seemingly change that. I can definitely see how such a premise may seem like it’ll result in a sketchy manga, but it turns outto be quite wholesome. However, it’s not like all of the premise was ignored or didn’t matter. Rather, it’s a critical aspect of the manga throughout, though what’s important to understand is why Tooru thinks the way he does. Tooru has a massive inferiority complex centered around the fact that Mika was the first person he ever went out with, while Mika had a lot of experience with men. He doesn’t think that he’s good enough for her, and thus wishes that they were more equal, but can’t imagine himself having experience with a lot of women, and thus wishes that Mika was as inexperienced as he was. A core aspect of this story is Tooru’s character arc in overcoming this inferiority complex as he struggles for his happy ending. Overall, his character arc is very well written, though it’s also quite frustrating. There’s slow but steady progress, but in a ‘two steps forward one step back ‘sort of way. Which is definitely better than ‘one step forward two steps back’ sort of way as things are moving steadily forward. But the steps back can definitely be painful and cringeworthy. Tooru doesn’t just leap from the future to the past once. Rather, he’s going back and forth quite a bit, seeing the effect that his actions in the past have on the future and then changing course in the past. And this often results in him deciding that it would be better for Mika to be with someone other than him and thus trying to put distance between him and her or trying to get her into a relationship with someone else. Still, in every case he eventually gets over himself. There’re pretty strong star-crossed lever themes in the manga, which combined with the multiple timeline aspect work incredibly well and make their relationship and relationship development really easy to get invested in. The back-and-forth multiple timeline nature also allows the manga to showcase the other characters in very interesting ways as well. Mika doesn’t get as much focus as Tooru but still gets quite a lot. She doesn’t really have a character arc, but the adult version of her has clearly grown quite a bit compared to her teen self. Just showing how her past and future selves are different was pretty fun in and of itself, but the manga also shows the transition between the two for a bit which was really fun, though I wish it was fleshed out more. There are a lot of other side characters whose lives are also affected by Tooru’s time jumping, with Tooru and Mika’s circle of friends being composed essentially entirely of people whose lives Tooru saved from turning into a mess. There isn’t all that strong of a group dynamic because the narrative is heavily focused on Tooru and Mika, but how they all play into Tooru and Mika’s story is well written. Overall, I think the writing in the manga is pretty great, though I feel is does get really messy in the last two arcs. The second to last arc I fully understand what it was trying to do and I can see why the messiness was necessary for what it wanted to convey so I don’t really have any issues with the arc. The last arc however, I feel was overtly messy for no real reason and that it rushed or glossed through a lot of what it should have spent more time on. I feel this arc would have worked a lot better if it was more straightforward. Still, all in all I would still have to say I found the ending very satisfying, and the epilogue was also really cute. The art I also found to be pretty solid. It is kind of strange that everyone in the manga looks nice except for Tooru who is often drawn to be pretty ugly, but it fits in the grand scheme of things and isn’t an issue when you get used to it.